Sunday, October 21, 2007

Phantasm II: Phant Harder

Ah, the late 80s/early 90s. I have a soft spot for lot of horror movies from that time. I was now old enough to sneak into R films at the theater and see things on the big screen. Phantasm II, the underrated (and oddly missing from DVD) sequel to Phantasm was just such a film.
Phantasm is a topsy-turvey world of dreams mixing with reality and a dozen sci-fi, fantasy and horror elements that make no sense, but taste great together. The films always feel like the breathless ramblings of a coked-up 8 year-old. "Blah! TallMan, Kill-Balls, Jawas, Ghosts, AliensFromAnotherDimension, ChainsawWieldingGasMaskWearingGraveDiggers! Ahhhhhhh!" I'm sure if you look closely, you'll see a drunken werewolf delivering babies.


So, anyway, Phantasm II takes place 10 years after the original. Reggie's older, Mike looks a lot like James LeGross and he has a psychic rapport with a blond girl, who I will call Blond-O since I can't remember her name. The dynamic duo break into a True Value Hardware and arm themselves with Chainsaws, blowtorches, and garden weasels to do battle with the Tall Man, or perhaps, Mossman. I know if I'm gonna do a little B&E, it'll be at a military surplus store, not the place that can make me a spare set of keys. But, since they come away with Reggie's super-gun and plenty of other props for the coming mayhem, I'll let it slide.


Reggie and Mike drive around a lot, see some weird shit, pick up a sexy hitchhiker that might or might not be the living dead and finally run into Blond-O. This sets the stage for the final battle with the Tall Man at the mortuary from Hell. We get to see some chainsaw on chainsaw action, numerous Jawa attacks, various Kill-Ball goreings (including my favorite where one of them tunnels around inside a dude) and Reggie using his super-gun against some perfectly lined-up enemies. Plus, the Tall Man bleeds French's Mustard. What more can you ask for in a film.


The movie did leave me with a couple of questions though. Why are the Kill-Balls easily trapped in flesh? Those suckers were breaking down doors, melting metal, but meat...stuck.

Second, sexy hitchhiker girl? Was she always the Tall Man in disguise? Did Reggie have French's Mustard-sex with the Tall Man?

The mere thought of Agnus Scrimm cooch has me flabbergasted.



Tall Man and his flying Kill-Balls... sounds a bit like prison lingo.


The Retropolitan said...

Supergun 5000 made me laugh way too much.

primal_0ne said...

funny stuff! I drove 8 hrs in august 08' & met Regg,Mike, & Angus in louville ky. Dream come true, they were awesome!! I hung out with Regg and his wife Gigi for 5 hrs at a party after the Reggie Bannister band left the stage. By the by if you've not heard, they rock!! These people were tops, just as great in real life as on screen!!

Anonymous said...


miami101 said...

I need to find all of phantasm movie's leave me a sight to cheakout thank you

Castelar García said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Castelar García said...

The Phantasm films have created a mysterious boogieman that preys on death. I discovered this film series by watching Phantasm 2 one dark night on cable TV. Following that I rented the first film and I enjoyed it because it had believable characters and a promising storyline that sparked my interest. In my opinion the only other actors who could play the Tall Man if this film series would get the remake treatment would be Christopher Walken or Liam Neeson.